I first started coming to SatEV 2 years ago. Before that I had only ever been to church for weddings and christenings. I had been chatting with a Christian that I knew and asking questions (something I do a lot of), I’m not even sure where the questions  were coming from, but I asked anyway. Each time one question was answered I would have another. He invited me to come along to different things that SatEV was doing but I kept declining. However one day when he asked me to come to church that weekend I said Ok (so don’t ever give up inviting people, because one day they might say yes). I was so scared and there was no way I was going to walk in alone so I made him come outside and walk in with me. The whole ‘church’ experience was so captivating that I had to come back the following week to hear more. Everyone was so friendly. Obviously the rest is history as I’ve been here for 2 years.

For my whole life I d idn’t really have any thoughts on God and my belief was that once you died that was it, which is a terrifying thought. My life was going fine (only the usual struggles) but it was starting to feel like something was missing. To me now it’s obvious what that thing was, Jesus. But I certainly didn’t get it straight away. Getting my head around what a sinful person I was, well that was hard. I’m relatively nice, help others, don’t smoke or drink (well not much), but it wasn’t about these things, it was about my denying God and who Jesus really is and what He has done for me. I desperately wanted ‘to believe’ but I think I was waiting for something miraculous to happen and for me to fully understand the Bible. That wasn’t the case.

One day I decided with the help of a dear friend I’d met at church to pray to God, to ask for His Spirit, to ask for forgiveness for all of my sins. He definitely answered my prayer. From that day on I have grown in my faith and my knowledge of God’s Word (mainly through the help of my friend and through joining a home group where I can ask as many questions as I want and of course with the help of God). I can’t explain how but I certainly feel different now. I look back and see things that others might say are just a coincidence but I know its Gods work to get me where I am now. I still have the usual struggles but now I cry out to God and learn to trust in Him with the things of my life. For me the hardest thing about being a Christian is the frustration I feel for my friends and family. I want them to have what I now have and I have to keep stopping to remind myself  it’s all about Gods will and not mine. A year ago my youngest son decided to give his life to Jesus; he was the biggest atheist ever. His life is completely turned around and instead of trying to convince me that God doesn’t exist, he is now trying to convince people of His existence. God is great!!!!!!

Over the 2 years I have definitely matured as a Christian, but I know I can mature even more, I want my faith to grow stronger every day and I want to be able to answer questions that might then make people think ‘I want to check this out for myself’. I know that between my church and my God these things are possible. Praise God for His never ending love for each and every one of us.

~ by Saturday EV on March 8, 2010 in

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